Divorce mediation

Today you hear more and more about Divorce Mediation in San Diego as an alternative to litigation. Divorce Meditation is when a couple hires a lawyer to help and inform them of the consequences of the dissolution of their marriage. The lawyer at this point doesn’t represent one or the other party. The lawyer's focus in mediation is to inform the parties of consequences and give legal advice on the impending divorce. The mediator remains neutral between the husband and the wife. That means the mediator can't give advice to just one party, and also can't act as a lawyer for either party. This includes property, retirement questions, spousal support and child support, custody, visitation or any other conflicts between the parties.

What the mediator family lawyer can do, though, is to point out in open session to both spouses things that each of them should be aware of and about what they're trying to accomplish. That open and free

exchange of information frees up both spouses to negotiate with each other in confidence. Because both spouses are working with the same base of information, it usually takes far less time to negotiate a

resolution that makes sense to both spouses.

The question that then becomes important is: what are the pros and cons of Divorce mediation. Which couples are good candidates for divorce mediation, and which should go the more traditional way and

be individually represented. Divorce mediation works well for people who both essentially have gotten past being angry or hurt with each other; they just want to move on.These are couples who have similar earnings or earning capacity. Couples with a level of confidence still with one another so they can negotiate an uncomfortable issue. They can separate themselves from the pain they feel at the time the divorce is going on and focus on what the future may look like. In my San Diego Family law practice, mediation has seemed to work best for couples who have equal strength economically and emotionally in the relationship.

Couples who have suffered verbal abuse or physical abuse will be safer being represented individually. When the level of hostility is such they the partners cannot sit in the room together mediation isn’t a solution. Couples where one or both spouses have have suffered any mental illness and couples who have unequal earning capabilities that have been long term should probably be represented individually. These couples who are in some way imbalanced aren’t ordinarily served well by mediation. It is safer to be represented by individual family law lawyers.

Mediation does require that a couple still work together on the issues that a breakup entail. They will be asked to come to a decision on what is best for them as a couple and for their children going forward .This still requires a level of trust and confidence in the other partner .